5/19/2006
The Con Game
Thad goes on to say that “good managers learn to recognize when an employee says he can do something but doesn’t mean it”. One of the responses managers should look out for is (and this one gives me goosebumps), “If everything works out well then I should be able to…” in regards to getting a project done. According to Thad, this is a sure sign of a confidence issue.
I say that it’s a sure sign that the manager could be a completely incompetent schmuck who doesn’t know their ass from their elbow. Let me explain why. That employee could be a perfectly able (and willing) individual. As a matter of fact, this person may have even been a high achiever on previous projects. So why the change? Perhaps the Idiot Boss has interfered one too many times preventing this employee from being able to get anything done, thus killing their confidence.
It’s true; if you meddle in someone’s work or throw something else in the mix that is completely unrelated but just as demanding and expect it to all be done at the same time, you’re going to have problems. I assure you of this. So now all of a sudden this person that you’re giving a project is answering you with, “If everything works out well then I should be able to…”. This means that they don’t know what you’re going to do to trip them up or sabotage them. They’re not mindreaders. If you do what a good manager is supposed to do then you’ll let them do their job and they’ll produce results. Get in their way and they won’t. It’s that simple.
So then Thad goes on to say that the 3 questions a manager should ask an employee who exhibits these confidence issues are:
-Do you know what is expected? (Yes, I’m not an idiot thank you very much. I’ve only been in this job for YEARS).
-Do you think what's expected is attainable? (It won’t be if you have anything to do with it).
-Can you do what is being asked of you and can you do it on time? (Knowing you, you’ll throw every obstacle you can think of plus 9 other projects that need to be done concurrently and then you’ll write me up for not getting this first project done, you dolt).
Here’s some questions that the employee should be asking the manager in return:
Did you get your degree out of a Cracker Jack Box?
Were you teased as a child?
Have you been skipping doses on your meds?
I mean, honestly.