1/27/2006
Things People Want to Say to the Boss
Unfortunately, I cannot claim these as my own but I had to share them since they gave me a hearty laugh. This comes from my friends over at toxicboss.com:
Things People Want to Say to the Boss
- Call a proctologist. You need the stick removed from your ass.
- Please try to find another career that doesn't involve people.
- If I didn't have a sense of dignity, I'd have smashed your face into a wall at least a thousand times. Oh yes, and f*** off!"
- Lead, follow, or get out of the way.
- You are the reason we're losing employees.
- You are the weakest link. Goodbye!
- Get counseling, stay on your lithium, and remember when you powder your nose, don't snort.
- I've probably forgotten more than you'll ever know.
- You are unkind, uncaring, disloyal, hypocritical, inconsistent, impatient, impersonal, irrational, insincere, and prideful. In a few less words, you suck as a boss.
- Maybe if you weren't such a tyrant, I might feel more positive about my job and about you.
- What the hell happened to you in your childhood?
- Get out of my way and let me do my job.
- You need to seek professional help for your need to control your environment.
- The reason I am taking antidepressants is because of you.
- Combine low salary with a hostile, stressful work environment, and your bright employees will leave. The not-so-bright ones are left behind, perhaps explaining your high position in the organization.
- Your personal skills are a joke, you couldn't manage an ant farm!
- Become human!
- We only act like idiots because you treat us like idiots.
- If I acted like you, I'd want to hurt myself.
- The lost-and-found just called and said they had found a spine. They were wondering whether it was yours.
- Take a course in dealing with humans.
- You are an insensitive, anal retentive a**hole who lacks the ability to manage even a one-block paper route!
- On a daily basis, thousands of innocent people are killed or maimed in various accidents...why not you?
- Find employees who don't intimidate you.
- If you were on fire, I wouldn't piss on you. Instead, I'd purchase marshmallows and invite everyone else to eat.
- You are a small and petty person with deep-rooted emotional problems. You'll die penniless and alone. Don't worry, though - I'm sure you'll see it all as someone else's fault.
- I hope your cat gets pregnant with your child.
- I hope a flesh-eating virus infects you.
- Please allow me to feel good about myself and the job I do, without being resentful of my good feelings and self-esteem.
- Your controlling demeanor needs to be looked at, probably in intense therapy.
- I personally would not be upset if you choked on a chicken bone!
: 6:37 PM < Home>
